not rich, just expensive

I’m out at the Christmas party for by Dad’s company. Its actually a really good party. Good food, plenty of booze and, the essential ingredient…. a good DJ. Under normal circumstances, I would be loving this and be up there dancing and having an awesome time. But because my family are here, I’m so guarded and aware of myself, even with a shit load of booze in me, that I can’t leave this table to go up and dance. Its lame, I wish I could shake it. I feel like I nearly can, after nearly two bottles of wine. But surely this isn’t the way its supposed to be. I don’t know why I’m like this, I wish I wasn’t, but I can’t not be. I don’t know how not to be guarded around them. It sucks.